


The One Where Maxie Takes a shower

by T_ah_ssels



Series: The Series Where [1]
Category: Pocket Monsters: Ruby & Sapphire & Emerald | Pokemon Ruby Sapphire Emerald Versions
Genre: Comedy, Domestic, M/M, More of concept than a plot line but, No sex or descriptive nudity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-25
Updated: 2020-02-25
Packaged: 2021-02-28 05:09:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22898536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/T_ah_ssels/pseuds/T_ah_ssels
Summary: An exploration of the domestic life of Maxie, Archie, and showering.
Relationships: Aogiri | Archie/Matsubusa | Maxie
Series: The Series Where [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1645888
Kudos: 32





	The One Where Maxie Takes a shower

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to my best friend and editor, Ashthegoat. They describe my writing as a literal stroke so their a real one for doing this.

Maxie stood in his bathroom engaged in deep thought, carefully weighing the pros and cons of his next move. Sure, he hasn’t bathed in three days, but it wasn’t that bad was it? Nobody had complained about any sort of odor at either of his jobs, which was a good sign. Not to mention that he was EXTREMELY tired. He nodded to himself, already half asleep as he headed to the door. Softly muttering about how he would shower in the morning even though he knew that was a lie. This admittedly had become a bad habit for the former magma leader, and he really couldn’t pinpoint when it started. He had always had a propensity for choosing work over his basic needs, but he’s also always been a firm believer in the importance of presentation. That included proper posture, appropriate clothing and showering daily, but at this point in his life, he found himself progressively caring less and less about that crap. He couldn’t help but chuckle as he pictured how his past self would react to his current state. Maxie from a year ago would probably be appalled by this, but Maxie from a year ago didn’t work two jobs plus overtime, so he could shove it.

He was ready to collapse into his bed until he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. It took him a few seconds to properly process his reflection, he couldn’t even recognize himself at first. His face and hair were coated in grease, he could actually see some acne spreading along his forehead.

“Oh Arceus, I look like shit”.

“Why don’t cha tell me something I don’t know”? 

Maxie jumped, startled by Archie’s surprise entrance. Typically his partner would make his presence known upon arriving, only Lunala knows how many times he’s woken him up doing so. But it appears he’s decided to be “cute” today, so he would be “cute” in turn. The redhead turned around with scowl as he was face to face with the laughing sailor and pushed him away. Despite this, Archie returned, going in for a kiss of all things. Maxie only scoffed and returned his focus to the mirror.

“You won’t be getting any affection until you apologize, Archibald”.

“What did I do this time?”. He groaned with an exaggerated pout, which despite his best efforts only yielded an eye roll and a stifled chuckle. Not even puppy dog eyes could break through Maxie’s pettiness.

“It’s not what you did, but what you didn’t do.”

It wasn’t much of hint, it actually made him more unsure of the situation. He had assumed that Maxie was just mad because he scared him when got home, but now he wasn’t so sure. Archie mentally retraced his steps to see if actually did, or apparently _didn’t_ do something that would get him on his boyfriend’s dreaded bad side. Thankfully Maxie realized what was happening and decided to put him out of his misery. In retrospect, a guessing game probably wasn’t the best way to joke around with his partner considering most of their actual fights start that way.

“Archie, for the past three days you have neglected to tell me that I look like an actual trubbish fire. How in your right mind could you let me leave the house looking like _this_! ”. He made sure to gesture to the grimy bird’s nest that was his hair.

The bearded man’s eyes widened with the realization before letting out a hearty laugh. He honestly didn’t know which was funnier, Maxie’s dramatics or the idea that he wouldn’t get mad at being told his hair looked terrible, with his pride being how it is.

“Ya try tellin The Great Maxie he needs a shower and see how ya fair”

“I would appreciate the honesty”

“That’s a lie and ya know it”

Maxie couldn’t help but snort at the comment before dissenting into full-on laughter. He was never one for strong emotions, other than stress and rage, but Archie just brought out something different in him. He always has, it was that quality of his that first lead him to despise him. He had been in this state of lukewarm emotion for so long that he couldn’t handle the ups and downs the sailor first brought about. He hated them and he hated Archie in turn, but people change. And Maxie certainly wasn’t the same person he was years ago. If he was he wouldn’t be working his ass off to buy Archie a ridiculously expensive engagement ring.

“Now get me a towel before I punch you in the face.”

“Normally I wouldn’t let ya get away with that shit, but I’m just happy yar showing’.”

Maxie then headed towards the shower, as much as wanted to sleep he could not ignore the fact that he was greasier than Unovan fried combusken. He quickly turned the knob to max heat and began to strip down. By the time Archie came back with the towel, the water was warm enough to enter. He could physically feel the grime wash off as soon as he got in, and it felt immaculate. He couldn’t believe how much he had let himself go. He spent three whole days wallowing in his own filth and would spend another if he didn’t see his reflection. The lengths he was willing to go for that man-child never ceased to surprise him. Sure, he couldn’t completely blame his predicament on Archie, but it was mostly his fault for always being so freaking thoughtful all the time. 

His boyfriend has always been better at romantic gestures, but it was high time for Maxie to have the upper hand. He’s taken great care in making sure that everything will be perfect, including the overly expensive ring. No self-respecting geologist would let their partner walk around with any old rock on their finger. Maxie was no different. He had an aquamarine ring picked out of the highest clarity, cut, and carrot. And to top it off he was going to propose on a boat, which Archie will never see coming.

The redhead had a huge smirk on his face as reached for the shampoo. With years of scheming experience under his belt, there was no way anything could wrong. He was so proud of himself that he almost didn’t notice that there was something amiss in the shower. Almost, but not quite. He was appalled, absolutely appalled. On many occasions, he’s been told that he’s been quick to lose his temper, but this was just a catastrophe.

“ARCHIE!”

“What?” He responded groggily, clearly he was almost asleep.

“Did you buy more shampoo and conditioner?”

“yeah, it should be where it always is”.

“No, it isn’t, but do you know what is here, Archibald? TWO IN FUCKING ONE SHAMPOO AND CONDITIONER!” Maxie hated two in one shampoo and conditioner with a fiery passion. He’s always had long hair, and anyone with long hair knows that two in one doesn’t do shit. Now he’s gone and wasted his time, he might as well had never showered at all. 

“It’s too late for this Maxie…”

“ _How do you think I feel Archie_ , we’ve been dating for five whole ass years. You _know_ how I feel about this, two in one is not effective in the slightest”.

“Just put it in twice, one time for each.” Maxie couldn’t comprehend what he was hearing, ‘Use it twice’ that was the most absurd thing he’s ever heard.

“THERE INS’T A P LENGENARY SOAP POKEMON WHO’S ENTIRE EXISTANCE IS BASED AROUND SWITCHING THE CONTENTS OF SOAP BOTTLES LABELED “TWO IN ONE” FROM SHAMPOO AND CONDITIONER, EACH TIME SOMEONE USES IT!”.

“I can’t believe I’m datin’ someone who cares so much about blasted soap”.

“Well, I can’t believe I’m going to propose to someone who thinks two in one is of the same caliber as regular shampoo and conditioner”!

“wait, yar goin to propose”?

Maxie had only one thing to say, after all, what more could he say besides, “This is why I don’t take fucking showers anymore”.

**Author's Note:**

> So I hope you liked this, this a part of a multi fandom sires so i can't guarantee they will all be hardenshipping. BUT i do have two more planed for hardenshipping so keep your eye out. (although i'm very busy at school so it may take awhile)
> 
> Constructive criticism is encouraged, i'm new to this so i'd appreciate some pointers.


End file.
